Now before any of you come at me, I’m not a gold digger-not even one little bit. The thing is I am soo f**king tired of this generation of guys, many who just can’t seem to get their sh*t together. I feel it’s not too much to ask for a dude who has a car, a job, and a place to live. Yeah, you can call me crazy or anything you want but I have dated enough broke guys and I am not doing it anymore—The Nigerians will say ‘Anor dey do again’
1. HE DOESN’T HAVE TO BE RICH, BUT HE CAN’T BE A DEADBEAT.
I am not saying he has to be super rich driving wild sports cars, earning some millions a month. Too much money even makes me uncomfortable and makes me frustrated and I can’t even relate to a guy who has lots of nice things. Our priorities just aren’t the same. I just don’t want someone who spends his days sitting at home and doing nothing, watching sports and always complaining about lack of funds. Get out and go do something about it mehn!
2. I DON’T WANT TO BE WITH ANY MORE GUYS WHO MAKE LESS MONEY THAN I DO.
I am not even a billionaire in the making and it’s not like I really want to be one but I work hard, I do OK and I pay my bills. When I need more money, I work more and this is simple maths. It’s depressing dating someone who makes less than I do who has no desire to up his game. I’m all for feminism and strong women and I support role reversal and all that. It’s just that I don’t make enough to support us both. Sorry dude!
3. I’M GETTING TOO OLD FOR THAT SH*T TO BE CUTE.Look, we aren’t in our early 20s. We might not be established and working our dreams jobs quite yet, but we should be paying our bills like adults and living outside of our childhood homes. I know, sometimes people have setbacks. Sh*t happens. Life happens. It’s all about the ambition and the drive, and 99% of the time if you’re still borrowing money from your parents, you’re bad news.
4. HE DOESN’T HAVE TO PAY FOR EVERYTHING, BUT HE SHOULD AT LEAST COVER HIS HALF.I’m perfectly down with going dutch. In fact, I usually prefer it, because I have independence and commitment issues. I don’t like owing anyone anything. At the same time, I don’t want to have to pay for both of us all the time. I don’t mind if we switch off, but it should be equal. That’s what a partnership entails — equality.
5. I’M NOT SITTING ON THE COUCH EVERY NIGHT BECAUSE HE’S TOO BROKE TO DO ANYTHING.I cannot emphasize enough what a huge turn-off it is when a guy can’t afford to go do anything. I’m an adult. I don’t want to go blow hundreds of dollars at a a club, but I do want to experience the world around me. I’m an explorer and an adventurer. If our dating life consists of cooking ramen and watching TV all the time, I’m going to be out the door before you even notice I’m gone. Get your sh*t together and get with the program.
6. LACK OF AMBITION AND DRIVE IS GROSS.No one wants to date a slacker. I don’t equate your worth with the size of your paycheck, but you have to HAVE a paycheck. There’s no excuse at this point in life for you to be unemployed, unless you just lost both your legs in a terrible freak accident or something. Man up and go get a job somewhere, anywhere, so that you can take care of yourself. It’s not that difficult. I’ve been doing it for several years now, and busting my ass to make it in a very expensive city. I expect the same from any guy I’m dating.
7. I WANT A LIFE FULL OF ADVENTURE AND SOMEONE WHO CAN ACCOMPANY ME FOR THE RIDE.I do know what it’s like to have barely enough money to get by. I know how much it sucks. Guess what? I did something about it. I worked hard, improved my pay, and now I’m living fairly comfortably. I’m saving all my extra money to travel and experience new things, because that’s something I’ve always wanted to do. If I’m with someone who isn’t down to do the same, it simply won’t work out. I’m into doing so inexpensively, but if you can’t even cover your own rent… no.
8. IF HE’S BROKE IN HIS 30S, I WORRY ABOUT HIS MOTIVATION IN ALL AREAS.I take a guy’s lack of money in his adult years as a serious indication of problems in other areas. If he’s this unmotivated and unwilling to do what it takes to succeed for himself, how will he step up in a relationship? Will he be proactive and work on our problems together, or take the same passive approach that he takes in his career? It’s a question that warrants careful consideration.
10. I’M NO ONE’S SUGAR MAMA.I can’t afford that sh*t! I wish I could, but even if I was rich as f*ck, I wouldn’t pay for his ass. Freeloaders aren’t hot. I would never coast along on some guy’s money, so I don’t want anyone in my life who would do it to me. If he can’t get his sh*t together, further his life and pay for his damn self, I want nothing from him. I don’t care if he’s great in the sack, or super funny, or whatever other superficial charm he’s skating by on. It’s not going to cut it with me.